Approaching Women – 5 Secrets For Newbies
1. Make 3 Fast Approaches For Warm-up
Look for three girls that you like, and are comfortable with, and ask them something. No matter what. Ask for the way, the time, a place to go out since you’re new in town, the next cool bar, etc. Be creative!
You don’t have to get into a conversation, but if it happens, don’t fight it. The goal is to get into an “approaching mood”, and most important, to get comfortable with the idea of talking to women.
You will learn that it’s ok and that nothing terrible will happen. This will remove a lot of tension from you and believe me, your next attempts will be much, much easier.
2. Detach yourself completely from the outcome
This is very important.
In order to make progress and get beyond your fears, I want you to have no expectations whatsoever. No matter what she says or does, I want your life to go on the same way.
Don’t have expectations!
See it as a game. Be playful. You’re there to learn and the only thing you want to get out of this is experience. If you get a number or e-mail in the end, that’s great. But don’t expect anything.
Should you get rejected, so what? No big deal. Just move on.
3. Pay attention to your body language
Would you believe me when I say, that your body language is affecting the outcome of your performance itself? That means, even before you reach the woman, she might have already decided whether she will reject you or not.
Watch your body posture. This subconsciously sends a signal of confidence, and shows that you know what you’re doing. This also increases your attractiveness many times over.
Keep your head high, slightly above the horizontal line, imagine an invisible string tied to your chest, lifting you straight up
always lead from your hips when your are walking during the conversation, never lean physically in, always lean back sit and stand always in the most comfortable position. As if you were at home. Lean on a wall, put a leg on the chair, use a chair like a sofa, etc.
Watch your hands. Don’t hang on to your glass. Put one hand into your pocket, and leave the other one free. Don’t try to look cool, (if you are, you will anyway). Have a slight smile – always.
This is pure gold.
4. Forget all pick-up lines you’ve ever heard
Trust me, they won’t work. You don’t need them.
The truth is, what you say only matters less than 6% to the outcome. You communicate the rest through other ways. Like the tone of your voice, and mainly through your body language.
The truth is, what you say only matters less than 6% to the outcome
Maintain strong eye contact during the approach, watch your body language, put on your biggest smile and just say “hi”.
5. Have a story prepared
Let the conversation flow naturally. Talk to the girl like you talk to your best friend. The more natural you are, the better.
Don’t compliment her to much, again, be playful and cocky. Speak slowly, and keep your voice tone low.
What happens very often now to newbies, is that they begin having trouble maintaining the conversation. They get stuck, since they can not remember any topic to speak about.
Or they ask too many questions, which is also not helpful to getting the conversation going.
It helps to have some kind of a story prepared. If nothing interesting has ever happened to you, you can make something up.
It really doesn’t matter what the story is about. What matters is how you are telling it.
It has to be told in an interesting and dramatic way. She has to be sucked into that story, watching your lips, like she can’t wait to see how it ends.
Can you do that? I bet you can. If not, practice!
From now on, you have several options. You can ask for her number/e-mail, change the location with her, or simply move on.